Monday, March 15, 2010

Mail order life

Well, it had to come up eventually. I am encountering more and more people, friends even, who utilize the Internet for dating. My own thoughts on the subject were revealed through my friend Larry. We were semi-slumped over the bar on Friday when I approached the subject.
"I mean [that's how he starts all of his sentences, then he rubs the sides of his beard like Rip Van Winkle] I occasionally go online and get a couple a Cd's and maybe a book. But a person?"
Of course, I almost fell off my bar stool, not for once because I realized that the rum was too strong, but because I was laughing so hard. Too hard. The other patrons looked nervous. Larry just giggled and sipped his beer.
"My thoughts exactly."
But then I asked around, really did some digging about this thing, and found that A LOT of people do the computer thing. And A LOT of people lie through their teeth on their profiles. It is actually quite entertaining to go through and find friends (and even family) on these sites. I had no idea that so-and-so was an expert fly fisherman and was a trim 160 pounds. It came as a shock to read that so-and-so has an "exceptional" body and they are looking for a mate with an exceptional body.
Which immediately puts into question what "exceptional" means. If it means a beer gut and unmanaged nethers, than Jesus, my body is a f*cking constellation.
So, point being, if you know someone really well and you want some humor in your life, check out their "ad" for themselves. I personally will remain on the sidelines and see if someone likes the real me. Most likely they won't but the exchange will be pretty honest.

No comments:

Post a Comment