Incline or inclination

I'm just now, at age 32, figuring out that life is a series of dichotomies; black and white, joy and despair, love and hate, war and peace, health and illness, confident and uncertain. Maybe this is why, for someone who is not a churchgoer, the book of Ecclesiastes is so appealing to me. You can't argue with a philosopher, and apparently god is a philosopher. I hope....
So, push, pull, backward, forward, and how does a dark-thinking intellectual mother deal with all of the elements that are out of balance?
Booze, lots of booze, preferably bourbon, preferably around 3 p.m.
And if booze isn't an option, due to lack of money or fear that you will be on the next episode of Cops, try lots of coffee, a few cigarettes, and making fun of yourself. That'll at least keep you from getting arrested at 2 a.m. and your kids carted off to some pedophile who is posing as a foster parent (oh, it's true, trust me).
There is no school today, something about veterans, and it is only 9 in the morning and already I've had three fights with my daughter and have had to physically remove my son from various dangerous positions on furniture and the stairwell. The little f***er is like a goddamn tree frog, he clings to everything, even when he is removed. I think he even has webbed feet. In my mind's eye, I can see myself flinging him toward a wall only to watch him stick and giggle.
Again, stick with the coffee, no one gets hurt that way.
Dinner was semi-normal (which to me means boring and ordinary), burgers, salad, french fries from the bottoms of three different freezer bags. I'm going to get creative tonite since I haven't built up the weekly nest egg for food.