An ice pick and a smile

Well, the ground is now covered with white stuff (not the white stuff from the 80's) and I am sipping my coffee slowly so that I can stave off the inevitable.
Shovelling. So much shovelling while the kids are safe in the livingroom watching old episodes of "Scooby Doo". And I know, the absolute second I walk in the door frozen and covered with wet snow and rain, that one of them is going to look up, realize that I'm there (having never realized that I actually left the house to brave this f***ing blizzard)and ask for a snack. At the very least. Thanks guys, no, don't get up, really.
I know they're young but c'mon, we were set to work by the time the diapers came off. That might explain the heavily muscled legs and the disdain we feel for anything wood related. Wood lost its charm a lo-ong time ago!
As I am performing the roles of both alpha male and alpha female, I'm deciding which one I prefer. I'm thinking female only because I like dressing the part. The alpha male plaid shirt is wa-ay too big for me but I need to wear it to do alpha male chores.
There ain't no room for Manolo Blahniks in my world today. Boots, gloves, a maul, and a shitload of coffee are on the plate for today. Then I get to pretend to be a charming journalist on the phone for a 10a.m. interview, when, of course, I will be covered with snow, my hands will be frozen, and I'm not sure that I will be at my most chipper.
And again, there will be the fetching of snacks. And, of course, reassembling the newly purchased Lego Star Wars ship that Lucian has broken at least six times this morning. YES!